Tips To Become A Gentleman
What does it mean to be a gentleman? Is it about wearing the right clothes or having the right job? Can you be a gentleman in a pair of jeans and sneakers or is it necessary to constantly be in a suit and tie? Being a gentleman has a lot more to do with your behavior and the way you comport yourself than it has to do with fancy clothes and an executive position. In fact, anyone can become a gentleman by simply changing a few everyday aspects of their lives. We’ve put together a few top tips on how to become a gentleman to get you started.
1. Define Yourself
There are no hard or fast rules on who can be a gentleman. You don’t have to rub shoulders with aristocrats or celebrities to join the ranks of true gentleman and you don’t have to become aloof or distant. What you do need to do is define who you are. Discover what is unique about you and be realistic. Bring out those inner qualities you have and accept the flaws as well. Self-acceptance is the first step to becoming a gentleman because you will be showing the world around you a very real and individual person.
2. Practice Good Hygiene
It may not seem important but good hygiene is an absolute must. A real gentleman should always look and smell neat and clean. Foul body odor is completely unacceptable when you are socializing and it really leaves a bad impression. The only exception is when you’re working out or doing some form of physical labor. However, there is a very real difference between smells that have accumulated in one day compared to those that have fermented over several days. A daily shower and things like deodorant and cologne are an absolute must. Keep fingernails clean and trimmed. Shave daily as well, or if you do have a beard, keep it trimmed. Take a comb with you wherever you go so you can always keep your hair neat as well. Whether we want to admit it or not, first impressions do count so always make an effort to look your best.
3. Honesty Is The Best Policy
One of the truest trademarks of a gentleman is honesty. It doesn’t matter if it’s at work or in your relationships, stay true to yourself and be honest with the people you interact with. Playing mind games with people or lying about who you are is usually exposed quite quickly and it will make you look fake. When it comes to relationships, don’t play mind games. Be honest with your friends and your partner. It won’t always be easy in the short term, but it will make life easier in the long run.
4. Be Polite And Respectful
In this day and age, being polite is often seen as a weakness but that shouldn’t stop you from being a polite person. Those that see politeness as a weakness are often the weak ones and they use their rude behavior to somehow try to show strength. It doesn’t really work though because rude people just come across as obnoxious and vulgar. Simple things like saying “please” and “thank you” can open quite a few doors for you and people you encounter will be more likely to want to help you when you aren’t on the attack.
Respect is also a must. Respect is a way of showing those around you that they are appreciated and that you have consideration for their thoughts, feelings and opinions. Simple things like not interrupting a person who is speaking and listening to what they are saying will leave the impression that you are a considerate person and a gentleman. Keeping your promises is also a must as a gentleman is always held to his word. That means showing up on time or, at the very least, calling people to tell them if you’re going to be unavoidably late.
5. Keep Your Language In Check
We all let off the occasional expletive from time to time, however, a real gentleman will try to keep such language to a minimum. A person who constantly uses crude and bad language is often seen as unsophisticated and quite ignorant. A gentleman is articulate and can hold a conversation without swearing so choose your words in every conversation.
6. Be Considerate
A gentleman always considers the needs of others. Whether it’s a member of your family or your partner, be mindful of their needs. You may have an elderly relative who lives alone. Visit them regularly and do a few little chores for them. Your wife or girlfriend may have come down with the flu so coming home with hot soup and a cheery demeanor will go a long way in making them feel better. Your efforts will be appreciated and you will be seen in a very positive light.
7. Hold The Door
It may seem like a mundane thing to do but holding the door open for somebody, particularly a lady, is one of the most common things a gentleman always does. This is one of the oldest signs of courtesy and consideration and it will never get old. The same goes for things like waiting for your date to be seated first or giving up your seat for an elderly person on the bus. Simple, yet very symbolic of a real gentleman.
8. Never Lower Your Standards
You’ve become the perfect gentleman and you have a clear set of standards when it comes to being polite and considerate. In today’s society it’s not easy to maintain these standards because many see them as obsolete and irrelevant. Not to a true gentleman. No matter how rude others may be to you or even if you are mocked for your gentlemanly behavior, don’t lower your standards. The right people will always appreciate who you are.
Chivalry isn’t dead, despite what some sectors of society would have us believe. A charming, considerate and graceful man will always be appreciated while a selfish, crass one will not. Bring out the gentleman in yourself and show the world what a real man is like.